Non-violent masculinity
Jun. 16th, 2011 12:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
queersanddragonsGender Studies: Non-violent masculinity
I think a type of masculinity we should promoted is the 'open man'. What I mean by that, is a 'normal' guy who is confident enough in himself to being open and comfortable with feminine and non-masculinity things. Being willing to be sad, to cry. An 'open man' may be a man who is straight, but is okay being around and being close friends with gay men. Or a man who is proudly anti-violence and a feminist. 'Open Men' are comfortable with who they are, and don't care what others think. They are open and honest with themselves. They support people who are different and are not threaten by them. They don't promote violent.
An example of this is the rap artist K'naan. He is a Somali-Canadian rapper. He lived in Somalia until he was 13. Most of his songs are very anti-violent, he rejects the gangsta rap image. Saying:
" All Somalis know that gangsterism isn't to brag about. The kids that I was growing up with [in Rexdale] would wear baggy [track] suit pants, and a little jacket from Zellers or something, and they'd walk into school, and all the cool kids would be like, 'Ah, man, look at these Somalis. Yo, you're a punk!' And the other kid won't say nothing, but that kid, probably, has killed fifteen people." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K%27naan#cite_note-eye-12)
His songs are often about his feeling about the world, his home country and his feeling. Yes his feelings, he raps about the need for peace and the power of non-violent. Like in his song "Take a Minute"
"How did Mandela get the will to surpass the everyday
When injustice had him caged and trapped in every way?
How did Gandhi ever withstand the hunger strikes and all?
Didn't do it to gain power or money if I recall"
The other thing I want to bring up is the band Cobra Starship and more specifically their cover of Katy Perry's "I Kissed A Girl". They covered the song, but gave it a new twist, instead of doing a song about the experimenting with homosexuality, they wrote a song about being comfortable with who you are and chicks loving it. They promote the flexibility of sexuality. Singing:
"I kissed a boy and they liked it
Got all the honeys in the club excited
I kissed a boy just to start shit
That homeboy was not about it"*
Being cool and clam about your sexuality is what they promote. The idea that girls like a guy who is open and honest about himself. Someone who is secure in their manhood.
"Now you don't even know my name, it doesn't matter
Don't even front, you've got no game, you're just a sucker
So what now, I clowned you, and I'm stealing your girl too
She wants a secure dude, and that's just not you"
This song depicts an 'Open Man' going to a party, seeing some guy acting homophobic and going over and kissing him. The homophobic guy is shocked/grossed out, his girlfriend/the-girl-his-was-hitting-on is turned on and 'Open Man' looks ballsy and awesome. 'Open Man' goes home with the girl and homophobic guy looks foolish. Imagine if this was the accepted norm. It was completely okay to be open and flexible about your sexuality. It's make love not war. Yeah, it is still a little 'violent', but they are trying to show that being gay or bi or whatever, is still masculine.
-I think this type of masculinity should be privileged because it is more open and easier for people to be who they really are. Violence isn't always the answer and we need to show boys and men that's okay to be sad, or angry and not uses violence to express that feeling.
-I really liked Katz's film. I thought it was interesting and had some very good points. He pointed out some of the things I have felt are true, but never really knew how to explain it. How men are almost more suppressed than women, because they are told that they can't do anything feminine. That would make them like women and women are less than men.
-I think our culture should accept the flexibility of gender and how it can change. I feel that a more open society well lead to people being happier. If we had a culture that accept people for who they are, we would probably have fewer hate crimes and less violence. I think we can make this happen by first trying to promote non-violence, there are people already doing this like the musician I mentioned earlier K'naan. There are many different groups out there doing this. Another thing to do is really just get people talking. If we have role models who are open and foreword thinking, we will have a great impact on the culture as a whole. If schools, collages, workplaces start programs for this sort of activism that would be great. The government passing law to protected minority and anti-violence. Most importantly the media needs to start showing and promoting different types of masculinity. If the media show kids images of non-violent masculine and says 'hey this is good!' that would help so much.
*They say in the song that they want to 'fuck shit up'. Which sounds violent, but from the other songs I've heard by them and what I know about the band. They mean it in a non-violent way. 'Fuck shit up' is making a scene, messing with peoples heads, and making people go: 'Wait... What?!?!'. Yes it is somethings violent, but overall they have a non-violent message.
I think a type of masculinity we should promoted is the 'open man'. What I mean by that, is a 'normal' guy who is confident enough in himself to being open and comfortable with feminine and non-masculinity things. Being willing to be sad, to cry. An 'open man' may be a man who is straight, but is okay being around and being close friends with gay men. Or a man who is proudly anti-violence and a feminist. 'Open Men' are comfortable with who they are, and don't care what others think. They are open and honest with themselves. They support people who are different and are not threaten by them. They don't promote violent.
An example of this is the rap artist K'naan. He is a Somali-Canadian rapper. He lived in Somalia until he was 13. Most of his songs are very anti-violent, he rejects the gangsta rap image. Saying:
" All Somalis know that gangsterism isn't to brag about. The kids that I was growing up with [in Rexdale] would wear baggy [track] suit pants, and a little jacket from Zellers or something, and they'd walk into school, and all the cool kids would be like, 'Ah, man, look at these Somalis. Yo, you're a punk!' And the other kid won't say nothing, but that kid, probably, has killed fifteen people." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K%27naan#cite_note-eye-12)
His songs are often about his feeling about the world, his home country and his feeling. Yes his feelings, he raps about the need for peace and the power of non-violent. Like in his song "Take a Minute"
"How did Mandela get the will to surpass the everyday
When injustice had him caged and trapped in every way?
How did Gandhi ever withstand the hunger strikes and all?
Didn't do it to gain power or money if I recall"
The other thing I want to bring up is the band Cobra Starship and more specifically their cover of Katy Perry's "I Kissed A Girl". They covered the song, but gave it a new twist, instead of doing a song about the experimenting with homosexuality, they wrote a song about being comfortable with who you are and chicks loving it. They promote the flexibility of sexuality. Singing:
"I kissed a boy and they liked it
Got all the honeys in the club excited
I kissed a boy just to start shit
That homeboy was not about it"*
Being cool and clam about your sexuality is what they promote. The idea that girls like a guy who is open and honest about himself. Someone who is secure in their manhood.
"Now you don't even know my name, it doesn't matter
Don't even front, you've got no game, you're just a sucker
So what now, I clowned you, and I'm stealing your girl too
She wants a secure dude, and that's just not you"
This song depicts an 'Open Man' going to a party, seeing some guy acting homophobic and going over and kissing him. The homophobic guy is shocked/grossed out, his girlfriend/the-girl-his-was-hitting-on is turned on and 'Open Man' looks ballsy and awesome. 'Open Man' goes home with the girl and homophobic guy looks foolish. Imagine if this was the accepted norm. It was completely okay to be open and flexible about your sexuality. It's make love not war. Yeah, it is still a little 'violent', but they are trying to show that being gay or bi or whatever, is still masculine.
-I think this type of masculinity should be privileged because it is more open and easier for people to be who they really are. Violence isn't always the answer and we need to show boys and men that's okay to be sad, or angry and not uses violence to express that feeling.
-I really liked Katz's film. I thought it was interesting and had some very good points. He pointed out some of the things I have felt are true, but never really knew how to explain it. How men are almost more suppressed than women, because they are told that they can't do anything feminine. That would make them like women and women are less than men.
-I think our culture should accept the flexibility of gender and how it can change. I feel that a more open society well lead to people being happier. If we had a culture that accept people for who they are, we would probably have fewer hate crimes and less violence. I think we can make this happen by first trying to promote non-violence, there are people already doing this like the musician I mentioned earlier K'naan. There are many different groups out there doing this. Another thing to do is really just get people talking. If we have role models who are open and foreword thinking, we will have a great impact on the culture as a whole. If schools, collages, workplaces start programs for this sort of activism that would be great. The government passing law to protected minority and anti-violence. Most importantly the media needs to start showing and promoting different types of masculinity. If the media show kids images of non-violent masculine and says 'hey this is good!' that would help so much.
*They say in the song that they want to 'fuck shit up'. Which sounds violent, but from the other songs I've heard by them and what I know about the band. They mean it in a non-violent way. 'Fuck shit up' is making a scene, messing with peoples heads, and making people go: 'Wait... What?!?!'. Yes it is somethings violent, but overall they have a non-violent message.
